Early in our trip planning, we included a stop in India on our way to Bhutan. Our flights were booked in/out of Delhi. Once our India dates were set, I reached out to a friend of mine, Kaveri, who was living in India with her family.
NYC Mom’s Group Buds
Kaveri & I met back in 2013 in NYC in a 2nd Time Mom’s Group (women having their 2nd baby). Sadie and her son, Kabir, were born a few weeks apart. We hit the jackpot on that Mom’s Group. All 8 women were kind, down-to-earth, fun(ny) and a pleasure to be around. Statistically, that never happens! (August 2013 picture to the left of a few of these wonderful ladies: Katie, Kaveri & Bianca)
Us ladies kept meeting for dinners long after our official structured group meet-ups ended. For the following 6 years we made time to meet a few times a year for dinner & drinks. We’d swap stories of motherhood, marriage & friendship, and laugh all the while. I’ve always felt so grateful for these special friendships.
Back to India
Kaveri & her family moved from NYC back to India two years ago. They settled in Pune, where both she & her husband, Vishal, are originally from. Their two kids are Tarini (4th grade, one year older than Paige) and Kabir (1st grade like Sadie). India flights booked, I emailed Kaveri to see if they’d be open to us visiting them. Kind of a bold ask (and out of my comfort zone to do so), but having the opportunity to visit with a local family was one that we didn’t want to miss (thanks for the nudge, Charlotte!). Kaveri was quick to say yes, that we were more than welcome to come visit them, so we gratefully hustled to make plans to travel to Pune from Delhi.
Pune Arrival
We arrived to Pune around 7:00pm and were met at the airport by their driver, Sangram. As we left the airport I noticed they had a big screen indicating the air quality. Pune was in green territory; in stark contrast to Delhi, which is currently at dangerously high levels of air pollution. Traffic was heavy as we headed to their place; Friday evening rush hour home, just like in NYC :)
We arrived to a warm welcome from Kaveri, Vishal, Tarini & Kabir. We ate some home cooked dinner (delicious!) and chatted the night away. We told them our goal for the visit was to just tag along with them and get a sense for their day-to-day life now in India.
Chill Saturday
Saturday was a fun, laid back day. Tarini & Kabir have golf lessons every Saturday & Sunday morning. We met them at the golf course of their club (Poona Club) and hung out there for a while, getting to meet the pros at their club & various friends that passed through. It was quieter than typical, as there was a big Indian Supreme Court ruling in the works that the country was following with great interest. We returned home from the club to another tasty home-cooked meal by their family chef.
After lunch had settled in our bellies, we walked across the street for some ice cream and to restock the girls’ reading library with a few paperback books from a book store. The girls read primarily on their kindles (via NY Public Library app & Kindle Unlimited books) during our travels. Reading a physical book is a treat they don’t often get these days, except when grandparents come to visit us on the road (thanks Papa and Grammy & Gramps!).
The kids headed straight to the playroom when we got back home and disappeared there for the next few hours. For kids who had met only hours prior, they played so incredibly well! Lots of dress-up and imaginative play together. Doug & I were reflecting that this is the first time the girls have had kids around their age to play with since August!! Suffice it to say, they were in hog heaven.
Late afternoon Kaveri, Paige & I slipped out briefly to an H&M store so I could restock a few things for the girls. Meanwhile, Doug walked to a nearby spot for a 30-minute foot massage; his legs were sore after some long runs in Dubai. Sadie stayed back to keep playing with Tarini & Kabir. We closed out the night with another tasty Indian meal at home and sparklers up on the rooftop, leftover from Diwali which had ended recently. A lovely day as a local Pune family :)
Sunday Funday
Tarini & Kabir had golf lessons again early Sunday morning. Since the girls (us too) had been getting to bed quite late, we decided to let ourselves sleep in and meet them after their golf lessons. We met at the Poona Club swimming pool, just down the road from the golf course. The kids & Doug were the only ones that swam; the rest of us sat poolside and chatted. The pool had a mini store on-site, so we jumped on the chance to replace Sadie’s full-body swimsuit (the one we started the trip with has stretched beyond recognition) and Doug’s swim trunks (his were on their last leg). They’re both schnazzy in the swimming pool now :)
After swimming we got changed and headed to the Poona Clubhouse to celebrate Kaveri’s father’s 76th birthday. Her brother (Keshav), his wife (Nisha) and her daughter (Nitya) were there too. The kids immediately claimed a “kids table” and the adults settled into a long table. It was a big open-air room that looked out onto a cricket field with a game in process. We attempted to understand the basics; not an easy game to grasp :)
Kaveri’s parents and family were absolutely lovely. They peppered us with questions about our travels and we did the same, wanting to know more about their life in India. Fair to say we all enjoyed the company :) When the kids had scarfed down their meal, they went out to play in the area between the clubhouse & the cricket field. They had a competition to see who could throw a rock the furthest, as well as collected & sorted trash (all their idea!). Awesome to see how well they played, left to their own devices, and with no traditional “toys” to play with. They were having a blast.
Haircuts!
We spent a couple hours back at the apartment in the afternoon, kids playing, and Doug & I working on some Southeast Asia trip bookings. I had asked Kaveri before we arrived if she had any haircut spots she could recommend, as we were all in desperate need of a haircut. Last cuts for all of us were in mid-June before we left NYC. Turns out finding time to get haircuts while on-the-go at a pretty good pace these past two months is challenging! Kaveri kindly set us up with appointments at a salon that she knows, so we headed there Sunday evening for our 6:00pm appointments.
Three haircut appointments (Doug, Paige & Sadie) happened simultaneously in the 1st round. I took advantage of this time (and the cheap Indian prices) to get a pedicure. Heavenly! My last pedicure had been in Lisbon in mid-August and my dogs were barkin’ for a re-do.
The girls were loving being at the salon. Funny enough, their haircuts finished before Doug’s! His hairdresser was very meticulous and did a great job giving Doug a new ‘do. He kept the curls longer on top (yay!) but trimmed up the sides & back nicely. All for the low-low price of less than $3 USD!
The girls were both super happy with their haircuts, especially with their hair blown dry so straight. They both got about an inch taken off the bottom and their bangs shaped up; they’re both working on growing out their bangs (!) so didn’t want to take them off course. When it was my turn for a haircut I sent the girls back to get express manicures (cut, file, polish). I knew they would love it, and at <$2 a pop, it was a great way to help pass the time.
Full disclosure, I wasn’t entirely comfortable in the hot seat when it was my turn for a cut. I’ve had the same hairdresser - the amazing Sparkle at Dramatics W. 72nd St - for the past 14 years living in NYC. Not a single other person has touched my hair during that time! I trusted her implicitly with my cuts (bangs included) and color. And now here I was with a stranger cutting my hair! It wasn’t the overall length I was worried about; it was the bangs. I told her to take ~3 inches (alot!) off the bottom and keep any long layers that were in there. When it came to the bangs I explained that I wanted the shape to stay (longer, swept to the side) but just a trim. Turned out OK; not exactly my usual but good/close enough, and so happy to get those dead ends cut away. Success overall!
Monday
Tarini & Kabir were back in school on Monday. Doug took an early morning run while the rest of us slept in. Doug & I have been clocking super late nights (until ~1:00am), pounding the pavement on our SE Asia trip planning/booking. I’ve been having all kinds of stomach discomfort the past week or so, I’m guessing kicked off by something I ate in Israel or Jordan. Who comes into India already with Delhi Belly?! :) So refueling on sleep & taking it easy were priorities on my radar; no runs the past weeks for me unfortunately.
Kaveri had mentioned a really good dosa spot nearby, so we enthusiastically headed there for lunch. So darn good!! Indian cuisine continues to delight. We ordered different dosas (ghee, paneer masala) and coffee, which came with a small shallow dish to cool it down (alternate it between your cup & the dish to cool the temperature down to a manageable level).
After lunch we went out to meet one of Doug’s mimeo colleagues based in India. More on that in this blog post. Yogesh was a pleasure to spend the afternoon with & chat about his life in India. He very sweetly brought us chocolates & local Pune snacks. Yogesh expressed his sincere gratitude to Doug for hiring him and giving him the opportunity to grow, learn and be successful. It was clear he holds Doug in extremely high regard. We had a great afternoon with him.
We parted ways with kind Yogesh and made it back with minutes to spare, to be able to join Kaveri and pick the kids up from their bus stop! They weren’t expecting us, so it was super fun to see how happy they were at the surprise of us tagging along for pick-up. The kids ran back inside and immediately (washed hands - a must! and) bounded into the playroom for some final hours of play together. I packed us back up while Doug focused on SE Asia stuff during the stretch before dinner.
Final Night Riff
Kaveri had asked the girls earlier on Monday what they wanted for their final dinner. Paige blurted out “chicken and curry”. So chicken & curry it was! It was delicious, yet again. It was so darn awesome to see the girls digging into all the traditional Indian family meals while we were in Pune. They love Indian food and were massively enjoying all the food. Paige especially loved the chance to legitimately eat with her hands! She has a real problem lately of rejecting silverware; we’re constantly harping on her to stop using her fingers and use her utensils :)
The kids had a final play session, said their goodbyes and went to bed. Kaveri, Vishal, Doug & I plopped ourselves down on their comfy couches and had a blast chatting the night away. We talked a lot that night (and over the whole visit) about the different quality of life they have in India vs. New York. They love being back in India and have no plans to uproot again; they’re enjoying a good life & are very grateful for it. We talked alot about where the heck we're liking to live after our travels (Vishal's bet is Hawaii or SE Asia). As well, what we (Doug & I) might do professionally when we wrap up these travels (NO idea!), and how to not boomerang back to corporate America. Vishal suggested we capitalize on Doug’s cooking skills and pimp him out as a “celebrity chef for pop-up dinners” as we travel. We had lots of laughs playing this out in many scenarios :) We also talked alot about how to honor some of our current practices (minimalism. in particular) as we go forward, and how silly we find the whole practice of feeling pressure to bring something to a friend’s place when you go for dinner, etc. It creates a compulsion for them to then bring something back to you, and isn’t giving your time sufficient & joyful enough? These were the kinds of topics we covered (among others) and it was a real treat to be present in the moment and chat.
Thank You!
We thanked Kaveri & Vishal profusely for welcoming us so warmly into their home & lives for a few days. We relayed what a genuine treat it was to tag along and get a glimpse of their lovely day-to-day life in India, and see firsthand how different/similar it is from their prior NYC rhythm. It is days like these - where we connect authentically with locals - that we will cherish immensely. Heartfelt thanks to the Apte crew!
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